Perspective helps

So, I'm trying to believe what I tell you all - Size is just a number. My worth is not measured by what the scale tells me. How I feel is more important than how I look.
Yeah, it's just as hard for me to assimilate as it is for you. But I'm working on it. Because it's all true.
I run, and work out, and eat healthy food. I work, and play with my kids at the park. My husband tells me that I'm beautiful and sexy - sometimes I even believe him!
So ok, I'm not a size 4, or 6, or even 8. I'm not my goal weight of 170 lbs. To be fair to myself, I have to say that at my goal I won't be any of those sizes, either. The smallest I get is about a 12. I'm ok with that.
And so that puts it in better perspective for me. That's 3 pant sizes from where I am now. And that's much less intimidating than thinking of it in pounds.

Now Hear This!

I'm really sick of all the hate talk lately. Specifically about weight. I find it appalling that people think it's just fine to be critical of anyone who is overweight. What business is it of yours? People think they're "helping" by telling people that they are fat, that they need to "stop being so lazy", and making comments like "Spandex is a privilege, not a right".

IT NEEDS TO STOP!!!!!!

Stop pretending that people need to be "shocked into taking better care of themselves". You don't know someone else's story, and even if you do - shaming someone is NOT the way to show you care. 

I'm disgusted every time I hear or read the hurtful things people say, behind the fiction that they're trying to improve peoples health.

I realize that it's not going to be a popular opinion for a trainer to have, but I'm jumping on the "body acceptance" bandwagon.

And by the way, next time I hear some jerk make a sick old woman feel bad because of her weight I'm going to punch them in the mouth.

I hate my body

I hate the fact that I hate my body.
I hate the softness. I hate the roundness of my belly. I hate the stretchmarks and scars from having babies.
That being said - my body is strong and healthy. It's tall and curvy. It allows me to play with my kids and dance and have sex. My body can walk for miles without getting tired, it can dance all night. It can run a group and then train an evenings worth of clients before going home and tossing the baby in the air.
My body is strong. It does so much. I wish I could just accept the "imperfections" as the physical signs of experience that they really are.

Being a trainer

The things I love about being a personal trainer are - helping people improve their health, watching them get stronger, assisting people in managing physical issues, knowing I'm part of making other people's lives better.

The things I hate about being a personal trainer - it's hard to make a living, I feel like I have to look a certain way, not being able to help certain clients because they won't follow their program.

Mostly I like being a trainer. Some days though, I wonder what in the world I was thinking.

Ok, so here's what I need to get off my chest - I'm a personal trainer, I have curves, and I LIKE my curves.

I know, I know.. I'm supposed to set a good example for my clients. But here's the deal. I've been fighting my own body for the last 25 years or so. I've been really thin, and I've been really heavy. My happiness has never been tied to my weight. It has been tied to whether or not I like and accept myself.
Now, I'm not saying I was at my happiest when I was 285 pounds. And I'm not even saying being heavy is better than being thin. What I am saying is that I'm tired of feeling like my scale is some indicator of how good a person I am, how good a trainer I am, or how good a mother I am. Bullshit.